


Rashomon Effect

by Davechicken



Series: The Pilot and his Knight [50]
Category: Star Wars Episode VII: The Force Awakens (2015)
Genre: Crack, M/M
Language: English
Status: Completed
Published: 2016-09-10
Updated: 2016-09-10
Packaged: 2018-08-14 07:06:56
Rating: Mature
Warnings: No Archive Warnings Apply
Chapters: 1
Words: 804
Publisher: archiveofourown.org
Story URL: https://archiveofourown.org/works/8003089
Author URL: https://archiveofourown.org/users/Davechicken/pseuds/Davechicken
Summary: <blockquote class="userstuff">
              <p>Truth is relative. Relatives aren't always true.</p>
            </blockquote>





	Rashomon Effect

**Author's Note:**

  * For [Isaac2Pace (Misty_Endings)](https://archiveofourown.org/users/Misty_Endings/gifts).



“…but what about bachelors’ parties?” the young Padawan asks.  


Kylo smiles. The Jedi in training - not his Padawan, because he doesn’t feel he should have one - has known him for years, now. But it’s only recently that he came of age and then came ‘out’, and Luke asked Kylo to be a mentor of sorts to him. 

It’s still odd knowing that only a few years ago the kid was still watching holo-cartoons non-ironically, and the fact that Kylo remembers him being a foot shorter is weird.

But. Poe said it was good to help give them some reference, and to let them know that there was still the possibility for love without needing to stay on the Dark Side, and that Kylo was the best person to help him, knowing what it was like to love another man. Everyone grew up eventually, and if he had someone who wasn’t his parents to talk to, he’d be more likely to ask genuine questions, and receive sincere answers.

“We had one shared one,” Kylo replies. “It was… huge.”  


“I’m pretty sure it lasted a month.”  


“That was the hangover.”  


“…pretty sure the pre-party was long, too, though.” Poe smiles wistfully. “And it went down in the annals of the squadron. Especially the karaoke.”  


Kylo frowns. “What?”

“The karaoke. When you– you know. You stole Jess’ makeup and decided to sing on top of the bar.”  


“I did no such thing.”  


“You did!”  


“Poe…” Kylo glances to the Padawan and back. This isn’t really a conversation he wants to have in front of him. “I would not sing in public.”  


“Babe, I’m telling you: you grabbed an empty bottle of brandy like it was a microphone and then tried to seduce Nien.”  


“ **That is a lie!** ”  


Poe stares back at him, and Kylo refuses to break eye-contact. He is certain he did not sing in public. He wouldn’t. Ever. No matter how drunk he was. 

“You were the one in high heels,” Kylo reminds him. “And you told everyone you were going to sue to marry both me and _Black One_. And Snap. Whether he wanted it or not. But in a non-sexy way, I believe you said.”  


Poe narrows his eyes. “I would not marry Snap, sexy or not. _Black One_ , maybe, but not Snap.”

“Poe, you had vows written. You made me promise to take care of your ship and your Snap if you died.”  


“I’m pretty sure I wouldn’t do that, Ky.”  


The Padawan looks between them. “…what else happened?” 

The little shit looks like he’s loving every minute of this, and Kylo is wondering how he can get the topic back to safer waters. Maybe he should just yell LUBE hysterically, throw condoms on him, and run away?

“Nothing.”  


“Oh, no, more happened,” Poe sing-songs.  


“ _Nothing happened_.”  


“Kylo decided to tell everyone we were already married anyway, because he got my Mum to do it when we were all on a ship when we were kids, because she was the Captain.”  


That bit he does remember, or the time that happened. “I wouldn’t tell anyone that, Poe.”

“Oh, you did. You also told them all how you got the ring from the box of spare parts on the _Falcon_ , and then your dad wondered where all the washers had gone because you took them all because you didn’t want my fingers to get too big for the one you gave me.”  


“Well, you were the one who told me a ship’s Captain could marry someone.”  


“Yeah, and?”  


“So it was your fault.”  


“Oh, so I’m a problem, now?” Poe’s eyebrows lift, though he’s not angry. He’s more amused than anything else.   


“That isn’t what I was saying, so don’t twist my words. _You_ were trying to get me to propose to you.”  


“Worked, didn’t it?” Poe asks.  


“…you proposed to me.”  


“…pretty sure it was the other way around.”  


“Are we talking about the first time, or the second?” the young boy asks.  


“First,” Kylo says.  


“Second,” Poe says.  


“…wait…” Kylo frowns. “You think I proposed the _second_ time?”  


“You did!”  


“Pretty sure I’d remember it if I had.”  


“Well, obviously not!”  


Kylo looks apologetically over to the boy, who seems to be enjoying this deeply. “Do you have any… uh… other questions? Because you have to find someone and either propose to them, or be proposed to, before you have a bachelor party.”

“Which one of you said ‘I love you’ first?” he asks.  


Kylo is going to murder the precocious little monster. “I think we’re done for today.”

“But I have more questions!”  


“Send them to my comm. I’ll answer them in writing.”  


Poe is smirking. He probably thinks Kylo said ‘I love you’ first, too.

(Wait… did he? Fuck. He’s never going to volunteer for anything ever, ever again.)


End file.
